I’m Jessy. I grew up in the Mojave Desert in a meth lab on the edge of nowhere and writing saved my life.

I write as if I’m writing into a black hole — as if no one will ever read it. Then I post it here. It’s not always pretty, but it’s always true.

This newsletter is where I can share raw, often unglamorous musings of the writer-mother paradox. It’s a space where I share pieces from my memoir, exploring my past as I try to make sense of my meth-addicted mother and, in the process, uncover deeper truths about myself. I write essays about navigating the chaos of loving someone who battles addiction, learning to love and build a family despite a childhood that taught me love was unsafe, and grappling with my inner critic while balancing a life devoted to both art and motherhood. Here, I dive into the uncomfortable truths of the human experience—truths we all face but rarely talk about.

I’ve created this Substack in hopes that it will be much more than a newsletter — that it will be a community. I’ve spent the last few years building a community on Instagram, but due to the algorithm and caption character limits, I need a new place to share my writing. A place that’s unrestricted.

I hope you find something here that resonates with you. 

This is more than just words on a page. 

This is a life lived. 

My life, and yours. 

This is a place where we can be ourselves even on our worst days.

This is us growing, noticing, being.

This is us in all the in-between places.

Why subscribe?

Most of this newsletter is free to read and subscribe to. However, if a piece feels particularly sensitive and private, and I feel the need for a safe place to share it, I will post it behind a paywall, accessible for $7/month.

Writing is hard. And as a mother, I’ve found it even harder—there’s so little space, time, and energy. Yet, I’m a better mother when I write. So I keep showing up here, for myself and for my son, to show him that doing what you love is important. Doing what you love is never a waste of time. This is a place where I pour my yearning, my grief, my rage, and all the parts of me that still ache. A place where healing and unraveling happen side by side. A place that feels safe. And it’s a space where I invite you to join me as I process all the messy, uncomfortable truths that come with fully living this one wild and beautifully chaotic life.

Every subscriber is special to me, and I hope you will support me in whatever way feels right for you.

Thank you for being here.

Tell your friends.

You can also find me on Instagram and my website.