Artist Series: Working Through Perfectionism
On Writing: A creative exercise by Megan Febuary
Meet
, a creative powerhouse encompassing the roles of Author, Artist, and Trauma-Informed Book Coach. Her work is a lifeline for writers like me—those battling self-doubt, craving permission to honor their creativity, and seeking peace in the messy beauty of the creative process. It’s wild to think that just six years ago, I allowed myself to follow my creative calling, and every step since has been a dance with self-doubt, imposter syndrome, fear, resistance, and perfectionism. But I’m here and I’m doing it—I’m healing. And this is exactly what Megan is going to be exploring with us in this week’s Artist Series.In this exercise, Megan takes us on a journey into the heart of creativity, healing, and the daunting specter of perfectionism. She explores meeting our fears with compassion, making friends with resistance, and discovering the healing not just in our art but in the very act of creation. Megan also shares her Perfection Spiral—a tool designed to navigate, understand, and liberate us from the clutches of perfectionism. Join us in unraveling key questions, reframing narratives, and embarking on a transformative journey toward embracing imperfection in our creative process.
Megan writes the Substack
where she shares weekly writing prompts and inspiring notes to help you write your book and heal your life. She believes in the power of story to heal, the way writing can transform us, and how the work of creativity can spiritually awaken us. I hope you’ll explore her work and let her guide you in honoring your creative process.Megan Febuary is an Author, Artist, and Trauma-Informed Book Coach. As the Founder of the storytelling brand, For Women Who Roar and the Book Year writing program, she has supported thousands of writers in uncovering their voice. Her background is in narrative focused trauma care and embodied storytelling where she received her M.A. from The Seattle School of Theology and Psychology with an emphasis on The Body is a Storyteller: Trauma, Body, and Integration. These Narrative Therapy studies along with her work as a writing coach infuses her writing with a unique psychological reframe on creative ruptures and repair. Her writing tips have also been featured in magazines, such as Stylist on how free writing can support mental health. Praised even by the queen of creativity herself, Julia Cameron, Author of The Artist's Way, who called her work "powerful and far seeing.” She is currently residing in the Pacific Northwest and writing her third book.
Before we get into Megan’s work, let’s start with three questions.
» What are you reading right now?
I am always reading one fiction book and one nonfiction at the same time. The fiction is The Silent Patient by Alex Michaelides. I love psychological thrillers, so this is perfect. I've heard so much about it and finally dove in. I am already immersed, so definitely recommend. I am also reading The Middle Passage: From Misery to Meaning in Midlife by James Hollis. I have no idea how I came across this book, but am obsessed so far. It is a brilliant look at the conversion to midlife and how we fear it, specifically through a Jungian perspective. Check it out!
» What do you do when you're coming up against resistance, and you can't seem to get to the center of the thing—the writing, the living, the task at hand? How do you get to where you want to go?
This is so dependent on the source of the resistance. For instance, if I am feeling creatively blocked and uninspired, then I usually write or draw what the block feels like. I describe it, paint it, give it texture. This is so that it materializes. This always helps me move forward with my writing.
If the resistance is coming up because of fear, then I do a lot of compassion and story work. I listen to my younger self, the root of their fears, and offer them the support, time, and care they need. This kindness is so instrumental in moving forward when fear is close by.
Just like perfectionism, resistance is a teacher. Steven Pressfield says it so well in his epic book The War of Art.
“Fear is good. Like self-doubt, fear is an indicator. Fear tells us what we have to do. Remember our rule of thumb: The more scared we are of a work or calling, the more sure we can be that we have to do it. Resistance is experienced as fear; the degree of fear equates to the strength of Resistance. Therefore the more fear we feel about a specific enterprise, the more certain we can be that that enterprise is important to us and to the growth of our soul. That's why we feel so much Resistance. If it meant nothing to us, there'd be no Resistance.”
When we befriend resistance, sit with the blankness, and show up consistently with curiosity in our creative projects, then resistance no longer has the front seat. We do. Your writing and art are waiting just on the other side of that resistance.
» Tell me about this piece. Where did it come from?
I love talking about all things the creative process and healing. One of the many topics that come up with writers I'm working with is perfectionism. Instead of an enemy, I invite writers to see it as a teacher, inviting us to become curious about our origins and how to embrace the messiness with fear. At the heart of creative work, the PROCESS is where the healing is, and that healing is at the intersection of addressing our fear of failure and success. I created this perfection spiral with essential questions for my clients to draw from when it shows up in their creative work.
A creative exercise
by Megan Febuary
Recently in the writing group I host called The Sacred First Draft Club, we chatted about perfectionism. It’s a beast of a conversation, and one that could be spent on for hours, days, years even.
I know the struggle well, the sensation of choking the perfectionism brings up in my body and my creative voice. I’ve seen it show up in my clients too, the same stuckness that arises often well before they give their creative process a chance to bleed out a bit. Here is the deal, this writing, this creative becoming is about embracing the mess. Can that be triggering? Hell yes, but the more we lean in, the more we can approach our stories and process with compassion.
Anne Lamott writes about Perfectionism so well in her Bird By Bird book. Go read or reread this chapter if you haven’t. It is transformational!
“Perfectionism is the voice of the oppressor, the enemy of the people. It will keep you cramped and insane your whole life, and it is the main obstacle between you and a shitty first draft. I think perfectionism is based on the obsessive belief that if you run carefully enough, hitting each stepping-stone just right, you won't have to die. The truth is that you will die anyway and that a lot of people who aren't even looking at their feet are going to do a whole lot better than you, and have a lot more fun while they're doing it.”
What I shared with The Sacred First Draft Club is my Perfection Spiral and I wanted to share it with you as well. The way we work with perfectionism is by understanding it, asking questions, and listening. Where does it stem from? What does it remind us of? How can we reframe the narratives attached so we can break through?
Here is the Perfection Spiral graphic above from my beautiful/ messy/ journal. My invitation is to set aside an hour to explore these questions from the spiral for yourself. (Don’t worry… I rewrote them below for you because my handwriting is so illegible, haha.)
1. What makes something you create/write "good" or "bad"? Who decides this and why?
2. What did you want to be before you thought you weren't "good enough" for it? Where did that dream go? How can you nourish it now?
3. What does perfectionism look like, feel like, taste like, smell like, sound like? Write on the senses, interpret the body's narrative around this word.
4. Consider the origin stories of perfectionism in your life. Write them down in a single sentence and feel free to expand.
5. How can you show love and compassion towards those early ruptures?
6. Lastly, how can you practice imperfection? That's right... let yourself be "bad" at something this week. Anything- writing, singing, drawing, dancing, etc...
I hope these questions awaken something in you and your creative journey. Remember, we must go through rather than around to heal our stories. Perfectionism, like so many things, is a teacher. Let's see where she will take us next on our healing journey.
Where to find Megan:
Website | Substack | Instagram | Buy Her Book
If you enjoyed this Artist Series feature, you may also enjoy this one with Rachel Larsen Weaver…
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So thankful to be featured. :)